Sometimes when we are going through difficult times, we can feel so alone. You don’t want to burden your family and friends with your troubles, so you keep everything to yourself. You know that some will understand, some will not, and there will be some who will not care at all. Several years ago, the Lord taught me a valuable lesson about feeling alone during difficult times.
One day I went to the mailbox, and I found a letter from someone I knew who lived in another state. I knew this guy, but I was not expecting a letter from him. Everyone around me knew that I was called to the ministry. They knew I left my corporate job, and my pay was reduced to a monthly salary that did not cover my mortgage let alone all my other expenses. Frankly everyone, including this guy thought I was crazy. All I knew was that I used to have a lot of great things, and traveled to a lot of great places, and suddenly I was flat broke and totally dependent upon the Lord.
When I opened the envelope, I was shocked to see a personal check for $1,000. Except for the check, the envelope was empty. I was overwhelmed at receiving this money. I was so shocked I dropped to my knees, and screamed thank you Jesus! I was shaking from head to toe, yet paralyzed because I was stuck to the floor on my knees. I was overwhelmed with the realization that the Lord provided for me. As I stared at the check, my emotions were a combination of relief because my bills would be paid for the month and guilt because I had no idea how I was going to pay him back. Even though the envelope did not contain a letter and the guy who wrote it did not ask for it to be returned, my first thought was that I was undeserving, and I wanted to repay him.
As I was on my knees, I looked up at the Lord, and said, “Lord how am I going to pay him back?” The Lord then said something I will never forget. He said, “I told him to give it to you.” That statement took my breath away. I said, “Ohhhhh!” I got up off my knees, and suddenly everything made sense. I realized that I’m not going through this life alone. The Lord was working not only in my life but this guy’s life as well. He put the $1,000 in his hands to give to me at that time. Praise God he was obedient! Let’s face it, he has a free will and could have refused. He could have said, “No way I’m not giving her $1,000. I’ll give her $500.” On the other hand, he could have said, “Ok, but not now, I will do it next week.” His response to the Lord affected both of us. From that moment on, I started praying for the people around me to be obedient when the Lord spoke to them, and I committed to doing the same. I committed not to delay when the Lord put someone on my heart.
I often think about how the Lord told this guy to give me this money on that day at that time. The interesting thing about this situation is that this guy says that he is not a Christian. He has always told me that he believes in God, but he does not believe in Jesus. The Lord used him to help me. I am not in a position to judge his salvation, so I take him at his word. I just know that just as the Lord was working with me, the Lord was working with him and that his obedience has caused both of us to be blessed.